No idea. Best guess it was stunted emotional development when he didn’t get his way. One time we were home and everything was fine so I asked him why he treated total strangers better than he treats me. He disagreed and when I brought up examples he started throwing glasses at a wall and screaming. All I could do at the time was apologise to calm him down.
Yeah, impossible to say whether calculated or purely a man child throwing tantrums (EDIT: needless to say, the latter is much more likely). Either way, no excuse to be that shitty of a person. Hope you’re doing much, much better now.
I left my ex after reading the book “why does he do that”. It made me wonder the same thing; why do they treat me so much worse than someone they never met before? They would never do this even to their worst enemy. Highly recommend that title, even just to get better at seeing red flags or for closure.
One time we were home and everything was fine so I asked him why he treated total strangers better than he treats me.
This is so weird to read. If he was mistreating you, how was everything fine? Or if everything was fine, why suddenly bring that up? I’d be pretty annoyed—not throwing shit to these annoyed, mind you—if my wife was suddenly like, “uhh hey so why do you suck?”
Obviously, his reaction is way out of line and I’m glad he’s not a part of your life.
“Everything was fine” as in it was a moment in time where things seemed calm and normal. But I was still carrying a weight inside from suppressing my feelings.
He had a habit of putting me down in front of our friends and making fun of things I liked just to get a rise out of me. That was something I carried with me for years and had tried to talk about before which resulted in a heated argument as well.
Knowing the danger he presented when talking about things while driving as one example, I waited until it was a moment I thought would be safe.
Turns out there was never a safe moment with that guy.
Holy shit, I’m happy for you that you got out of that. You (and everyone reading this) deserve relationships that make your system feel safe, loved & respected, and your support reciprocated 🫂❤️. I hope you’ve connected with someone better!
Did you ever figure out what he was trying to accomplish there? Or is it really just as stupid as it seems?
No idea. Best guess it was stunted emotional development when he didn’t get his way. One time we were home and everything was fine so I asked him why he treated total strangers better than he treats me. He disagreed and when I brought up examples he started throwing glasses at a wall and screaming. All I could do at the time was apologise to calm him down.
Yeah, impossible to say whether calculated or purely a man child throwing tantrums (EDIT: needless to say, the latter is much more likely). Either way, no excuse to be that shitty of a person. Hope you’re doing much, much better now.
I would love to hear the counterpart.
I left my ex after reading the book “why does he do that”. It made me wonder the same thing; why do they treat me so much worse than someone they never met before? They would never do this even to their worst enemy. Highly recommend that title, even just to get better at seeing red flags or for closure.
That guy had a high chance of snapping and killing you, glad you got out ok
This is so weird to read. If he was mistreating you, how was everything fine? Or if everything was fine, why suddenly bring that up? I’d be pretty annoyed—not throwing shit to these annoyed, mind you—if my wife was suddenly like, “uhh hey so why do you suck?”
Obviously, his reaction is way out of line and I’m glad he’s not a part of your life.
“Everything was fine” as in it was a moment in time where things seemed calm and normal. But I was still carrying a weight inside from suppressing my feelings.
He had a habit of putting me down in front of our friends and making fun of things I liked just to get a rise out of me. That was something I carried with me for years and had tried to talk about before which resulted in a heated argument as well.
Knowing the danger he presented when talking about things while driving as one example, I waited until it was a moment I thought would be safe.
Turns out there was never a safe moment with that guy.
Holy shit, I’m happy for you that you got out of that. You (and everyone reading this) deserve relationships that make your system feel safe, loved & respected, and your support reciprocated 🫂❤️. I hope you’ve connected with someone better!