Spaghetti_Hitchens

Made a comment that pissed of my wife FOR THE GLORY OF THE EMPIRE!

We are so deeply gerrymandered, it’s maddening

Have they figured out what to name the pigeon mascot?

Finally. Was starting to think my wife’s strap-on was never going to be delivered

Well duh. Peartube is the federated choice for fruits!

OP, were you a creeper secretly living in my house?!

Turning my life around 360 would mean my alcoholism is out of control again.

That’s how I read that

The average person has slightly more than one skeleton inside of them

They want facial recognition so they know whom to add to their list of enemies

Pushing their way to the front of the line to get the last jelly donut

I think the Prime Directive is misunderstood. It’s simply a directive that’s wholly divisible only by itself and one.

His given name is Carlos Banana

Why would you want to remove the protective layer of dirt?

No no… That would be a thin blue whale. This whale is clearly a porker… so I guess it is about the police after all.

If incest was good enough for Noah and his family, it’s good enough for you

Given the opportunity, I would gladly have a beer or two with Guy.

I read ATACMS as Attack 'Ems

Algae-covered sloths are about as close as you get.

Man, there are surfers who’ve never caught a wave that big