Hey, try not to fuck any butt on the way through the parking lot!

Just be happy it wasn’t “Buttfucker 3000” like that one guy in Zoom court a few years back.

Math and statistics are clearly conspiring with him to hide the truth. Why else would they use Arabic numerals?

ICE Girls
Sue Me and Three Banshees
Guess Who (Is In The Epstein Files)
Cross-eyed, Shrill, Wax & Too Young
The Stooges

You joke but once you collect five of them, they can be traded for a sternly-worded letter.

But we aren’t even talking about the crusades or modern Catholic church here, are we? Think you’re in the wrong thread.

Shame-edit preserving prior content above: I see what you’re saying, yeah, shouldn’t do that either.

Ballahu akbark!
The ball is most great!

Kristi “Ke-bork-ian” Noem begins sweating profusely from the strain of trying to figure out which answer he wants to hear.

On top of the base layer of fucked-up-ness, using the idea of dogs like this is unconscionable. They’re too sweet and pure to be shoe-horned into bigoted bullshit.

Making the stickiest icky.

Maybe the real Ivanka is under a golf course somewhere and his old buddy Jeff gave him a replacement. Wouldn’t make things better but it might explain why he forgets.

“Working” is a stretch. They’re the Wal-Mart door greeters of air travel. If a TSA agent stands next to a janitor, they’ll briefly be useful-adjacent and that’s the closest they can get to providing a valuable service without violating the terms of their employment.

Shut down the TSA. Skip the extra steps and go straight to UBI.

The calories don’t count if I pass out before I log them.

Must be a sat-tiva.

At the risk of stating the obvious, an attack now would catch them while their Pantsir’s down.

Happens to me too sometimes. Might be heavy topics that I’m still dwelling on or something I’m feeling better about (but maybe had been losing sleep over previously). Given the time of year, vitamin D deficiency is something else I’d consider but not as my first thought.

Hu- ah, shit.

It’s more efficient if they’d post the names and addresses. Cut out the middleman and get those letters of sincere appreciation where they’re needed.

Boof boof bass.

There are preschoolers with fingerpaint and construction paper making better graphics than this and the current administration should not be allowed within 1000 yards of any of them.

I’ve seen this one before.