• 2 Posts
  • 142 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
cake
Cake day: September 25th, 2023

help-circle
  • And then a man child had a temper tantrum and destroyed galactic civilization single-handedly. Sure. Okay. Have fun with the rest of the show, but that’s where I turn in for the night.

    I felt the same way, at first. Then I realized that we have other things in the Trek canon that asks as much suspension of disbelief:

    • “God” lives at the center of the galaxy and is a right bastard. Also happens to resemble Chuck Heston as Moses.
    • Psychics and psychic abilities are a thing
    • V’ger
    • Q and the continuum
    • Whatever species Guinan is, and their supernatural temporal sensitivity
    • Tachyons and the rest of the fictional subatomic zoo
    • Mirror Universe
    • Time travel, but mostly to whatever year the show was made, and for the occasional Deus Ex Machina device
    • SPACE FUNGUS

    Edit: my head-canon for the weirdness of Disco’s first season is that they really wanted it to be the start of a Kelvin-verse TV reboot, but were coy about it.

    Edit 2: I forgot about the Kardashev Type 3 civilization of robots living just outside our galaxy, that will turn the Milky Way into a lifeless wasteland if anyone so much as prank calls them. But they made their digits really hard, but possible, to find.







  • The dog is the only one that can’t actually consent to space travel, and regardless, couldn’t possibly know the risks. It is innocent, and doesn’t deserve a violent fate.

    Everyone else knows that they signed up to live in a metal box, with an artificial biosphere, which is all that separates them from the cold void of deep space. Also, said deep space is jam-packed full of things trying to actively break that metal box, if the crew doesn’t beat them to it first. And nobody knows that better than Seven.








  • Literally everything about the Ba’ku-Son’a conflict falls apart at the slightest scrutiny.

    I know some of the other Trek movies have this problem, but this goes especially for Insurrection: it felt like a mediocre TNG TV episode stretched out way too long. Much like a Son’a skin treatment. Also, there was just something about it that felt like a re-hash of an actual TNG episode, but I can’t pin down which one.

    I will contend that Generations takes the cake as the worst TNG movie. Obviously, the goal of this film was to get Kirk and Picard on the screen at the same time. Everything else in this film is a contrivance to make this happen, and it’s not even good science fiction to get us there. To add grevious insult to injury, we get tragically little screen time between Malcom McDowell and Patrick Stewart and their poorly crafted motivations in the film’s “climax”. This casting choice should have surpassed Wrath of Kahn by a light year for scenery chewing awesomeness, but is instead overshadowed by Capt. Kirk barely accomplishing anything instead.

    Also, in a moment of “let’s double-down on fan-service”, Picard Season 3 has a nod to Generations. There’s a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment when the gang is on the Daystrom Institute space station. A sealed room is marked as containing the remains of Capt. Kirk, probably of interest since he went MIA only to turn up decades later in Picard’s logs as having returned from the Nexus.



  • Ah yes, the ledgers.

    Actuarial acrobatics so foul, that they are still talking of it on Feringinar to this day. The Klingons involved thought they had invented a new martial art by way of mathematics, and their deep fiscal wounds would be the stuff of song and wine in Stovokor. Unfortunately, it was a hilariously naked attempt at simple fraud. No double-books, no accumulation of rounding errors, no plausible line-items for non-existent goods, no money laundering, no elaborate fences, no nameless middlemen that aren’t middlemen, no real subterfuge. Just plain, conventional, bad math and bogus prices. No, the legend persists not because of how brilliant a scam this was, but rather how something so simple almost toppled one of the greatest houses on Kronos; a practical bankruptcy for a Klingon! That is, until Quark came along and explained the deed in plain, simple, Federation Common tongue (ugh) so that even a baby could understand.



  • @Stamets, you’ll be missed.

    I don’t know what condition c/Risa was in before you got here but you clearly helped build the phenomenon it is today. I know that, by your own admission, you’re (re)posting largely out of a hand-built database of old Trek memes, lovingly archived from elsewhere. But I wouldn’t think that a small task - it’s a lot more effort than any of us shitposters ever summoned for a few laughs. So, we’re all standing on your shoulders to an extent. And all of it has been the highlight of my post-Reddit online reading this year, so thanks for everything.

    See you out in the Fediverse.