I also get a lot of value from Jessica McCabe’s How to ADHD – I bought her book a while ago and I promise I’ll start it any day now :3 I think a lot of the strategies may be appropriate for other flavors of neurospicy too.

You know the joke about how everyone who drives faster than me is a dangerous maniac, and everyone who drives slower is incompetent? We really do tend to see the world in relation to ourselves, and I think that it’s because we take ourselves as the “normal” baseline there is this fear of appropriating. ADHDers struggle with focus “more than normal”; I’m normal; therefore they must have it worse than me and I’m not part of that group.

Coming out as trans taught me that it is possible for me to be in a minority group without realizing it, and I’ve been trying to see myself and where I fit in in relation to the whole of society without centering myself. And also not to compare myself to some perceived “normal” baseline, but just play with the hand I was dealt. (I’m not trying to be maudlin there: I have qualities than I’m happy about too!)

Can I chime in here? (I got an ADHD diagnosis last year and a “probably” for ASD)

Aside from medication (which helps a lot!) one thing I learned is to accept that I’m going to have difficulty with getting things done and navigating some social situations, and that’s OK: I don’t need to beat myself up about it. Just like hidden gender dysphoria, I didn’t realize how much stress I was putting myself under reflecting on how badly I handled social encounters, or not keeping up with hobbies and recreation I felt I “ought” to be doing. And then I realized that this applies whether or not you are diagnosed with anything in particular! It’s really good just to (try to) chill out.

Oh, and if you’re not familiar with rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) I can recommend this video (their channel is full of good stuff!)

Those are amazing!

Is there a good community to share cooking photos and recipes, I wonder? I’d like to see more.

My brain is broken.

• I really like being on HRT and living as a woman
• I’m faking being trans so well all my friends and even three psychiatrists believe me
• Everyone wants to be a woman anyway
• What are trans men I don’t even

Did someone say baby trans? This is me last summer.

I hope your ass feels better. That’s a great story to look back on and laugh!

first i was afraid, (i was petrified)

Kept thinking I could never live as who I was inside
But then I spent so many nights afraid of doing something wrong
And I grew strong, and I learned how to get along
And now I’m out, on HRT,
A skater skirt and painted nails and socks pulled up above the knee
I should have thought about the clock, ticking on through puberty,
If I’d have known for just one second I could be the real me

… sorry, don’t know what came over me …

So my paranoia of course likes to insist that everyone is secretly clocking me but pretending I pass just to fuck with me. I got a chance to test it last week when I met a friend-of-a-friend who doesn’t know anything about me.

Me: Hey, wanna see a photo of me when I was younger?
FOF: Okay… woah, your hair’s really short!
Me: Yeah, I, er, used to cut it like that…
FOF: Wow, you were quite the tomboy!
Friend: Less a tomboy, more like a boy.
FOF: (makes “WTF are you talking about” face) huh?? (looks again) ohhhhh!

And much laughter was had. So I guess I can safely continue to ignore the voice in my head.

Oh, and there was the time someone assumed I was non-binary but couldn’t figure out which way. Serves me right for dressing masc that day I guess :3

I see plenty of OCD here but no transphobia. You’re OK <3

If you say you’re non-binary, you are. I’ll believe you. And hopefully everyone else here will too.

And if it turns out later that you’re not, that’s cool too.

And if you were doubly mistaken and you actually are? No problem. We can go on as long as you like, and you’re not harming anybody.

I guess this won’t be on anyone’s radar who isn’t in Japan, but I saw the new “This Is I” on Netflix. I was pretty apprehensive going in, but it turned out to be IMHO a compassionate treatment of the subject matter.

It could be very triggering though, so be careful if you’re struggling with dysphoria or transphobia.

I have a cis woman friend who’s going through menopause, and often complains about symptoms.

Her: Is there nothing I can do about this?
Other friend (cis woman, on HRT for menopause) + me (trans woman, on HRT for girl): ESTROGEN!
Her: Yeah, but… that’s kind of a big step…

It’s not just trans people who are scared to commit, y’all.

Wow, that was something. There are things in there that I don’t really relate to, for which I’m thankful. I guess my response to the self-doubting voice is usually “yeah, this might all be a huge mistake. So what? yolol”

But that section on looking back at the kid I supposedly was, and not feeling any connection to them; not really knowing how I managed to get this far, seeing the calendar skip from decade to decade… yeah, I felt that. “I didn’t want to live until I came out”: ain’t that the truth.

For me, “I go by <name> now” was enough, since I don’t like to make a big thing of it. Usually my appearance is enough to get the message across, but if I need to my usual lines are either “I’ve joined the girls’ team” or “I gave up being a man”.

It’s a beautiful feeling when everything is nicely encapsulated.

I counted in the new year surrounded by lesbians. It was fun.

I finally had my initial consult for bottom surgery! Still a few more hoops to jump through, but it should happen some time next year.

People are gendering me female (and acting interested!) even on zero-effort days.

And I’ve just about worked up the courage to visit a lesbian bar over new year 👩‍❤️‍👩

So, pretty good <3

Oh, this is an excellent question.

Yeah, everything that had been general background malaise became a lot more specific once I knew I was trans. It became a lot easier to pinpoint “I don’t like this about myself”. Which sucks, because I felt bad, but was also good because I could do something about it. Mostly that was “wait for HRT to sort it out”. And, mostly, HRT has fixed it. Or just time in general, like growing my hair out or losing weight.

The other thing I noticed is I tend to have a single thing that really bothers me, and everything else is a lot less of a bother. Once that’s dealt with, the next most important thing becomes apparent, and so on. At first I didn’t know whether I wanted bottom surgery, because I was so upset just looking male in general. But once my face softened up and my hair started to grow out, it suddenly became very obvious to me that surgery would be necessary.

The absolute worst thing when I was just starting out was my face looking like a man. I tried makeup, and that just made me look like a man in makeup. But, slowly, it started working: a bit of mascara made me feel better. Then foundation started smoothing out my face, rather than highlighting the masculine features. Eye shadow and lipstick started looking good.

Time-wise, I think the absolute worst period for me was about three months in. Six months, I started to see the effects of HRT. Nine months, I started passing as a woman. Twelve months, I could see it for myself.

Good luck!

Out drinking with friends, some guy we met at the bar was fawning over me. Admittedly he was a bit drunk but still, I couldn’t quite believe it. I guess this is a thing that’s going to happen from now on.

Why can’t there be more lesbians where I live :/

Do you mean TeX (not GNU though)?

The related package METAFONT converges on e, as well.

Marriage went from “I guess we’ll figure this out” to “who gets the house” rather quickly…

Oh well, maybe I can find someone new who’s into women.