To be clear, im queer and im in a relationship with a gay cis man.
Some days ago we were watching a sketch on YouTube about the gay best friend stereotype, where the joke was basically “I can be misogynistic and can walk into female dressing rooms because im gay”. I was trying to gather my thoughts to write a piece about it, personally I have no problem being the “gay friend” to my female friends, but there are a lot of stupid and harmful misconceptions about it. I would like to hear some of your opinions about it.
Being a gay best friend doesn’t mean you can flout misogyny. Even though I am non binary (amab) I respect women’s spaces. The patriarchy doesn’t end just because I identify differently now. Afab are in clear and present danger around amab. When I see women I think “Are they going to respect my gender identity?” But what they evaluate is “Is this person gonna go Ted Bundy on me?”
Yeah, getting into female spaces while still being kinda masc presenting without being explicitly invited first is just an invasion of privacy and violating boundaries.
What’s amab/afab?
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Gotcha, thanks
It stands for assigned male/female at birth respectively. Used in trans circles to specify what genitals someone had at birth (or was forced to have, in the case of intersex people whose doctors just chopped stuff off as soon as they were born).
This is not accurate.
Leaving aside the fact you were talking about gender in the first half of your post, and then switched over to assigned sex as if they were the same thing, a more accurate statement would have been “AFAB folk, and gender diverse AMAB folk are most at risk from cishet men”
Your statement here positions some of the main targets of aggression as being the aggressors
Yikes. Not even close.
I love and appreciate you so damn much. 💕
“Can” in this context means nobody is going to challenge him on it.