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The article’s not that bad, some folk aren’t happy!
Let me guess, their “expert” says to double down.
In many cases, parent-child estrangements are a cycle — “they’ll re-engage, then they’ll fall out again,” Blake said. “One of the key things from the research is that adult children will reach out and if they see nothing has changed, they’ll estrange again.”
No, I actually think it’s a pretty good article, and comes surprisingly close to outright saying the parents are the problem
In my experience, even when I’ve framed it as “something needs to change” to try to be less direct in saying that they need to change, they still just say “correct, you do need to change.” Hopefully some people will get it, though.
Lmao that’s the hardest thing is realizing that there’s no magic words that will ever pierce their skull. They keep acting like you speak a foreign language because it’s easier to fake “not getting it” rather than come out and say the truth which is “I don’t value you enough to change my behavior”.
Once I gave up and quit my life got a lot easier.
I wouldn’t be shocked if they said to kidnap said adult children and send them to reeducation camps brought to you by PragerU
Even better, it was “hostage negotiation tactics.”
I had a read through, and they’re entirely not stating anything about “quit being fascist,” naturally.
Or taking responsibility, also feels like it manipulates the narrative. Reading some of this is giving me PTSD anxiety from dealing with my parents. Knowingly trapping you into proving how they make you feel. Because you can’t come up with examples on the spot when they corner you means you must be making this up.
This seems a good excuse to repost his fascinating post about estrangement: https://issendai.com/psychology/estrangement/missing-missing-reasons/
*this
Expert is from Texas, just kinda want to put that out there lol article is about how you would expect it to be feels a bit manipulative while also sounding professional.
I shouldn’t have read the comments.
I’d just like to say that being from Texas by itself doesn’t indicate anything. Many million people here are not Republicans
No, but the Republicans are extra shitty there.
Are they though? Republicans are awful everywhere. I also think the Texas Legislature is a surprising place, the House in particular, where rural Republicans align with Democrats on a number of issues and regularly kill bills together. Of course none of that stuff hits national headlines though, just the bad stuff that gets through. All I’m saying is thank gods I don’t live in Florida
No, there are some states where they’re in par with Texas Republicans, or almost, but I’m general, Texas Republicans are worse than those in other regions.
“If someone says, ‘When you criticize my weight, I left dinner feeling really, really upset,’ that’s a fact. That’s the person’s interpretation,” he said.
I don’t feel like thats an interpretation. Why call it a fact and interpretation, did you fail high-school writer?
It seems poorly worded. I think they were trying to say that the person’s interpretation of what happened is a fact. Basically that someone can’t handwave away how a person says they feel as if it’s not true; how a person says they genuinely felt about something is true to them. I assume it is supposed to be targeted towards estranged parents who constantly dismissed their child’s emotions and literally cannot understand how that is a bad thing to do.
I took it to mean that feelings are facts - meaning the parent should take it as a true statement about their child’s feelings and not try to argue with them about why their feelings are wrong.
Not well phrased at all.
It’s doublethink. They’ve been peddling it for like decades now.
Its manipulative, its like making someone cry and then telling them feelings aren’t facts.
