• TransNeko@lemmy.world
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    4 hours ago

    Nazis, Israeli abominations, and christian pedophiles go to heaven… why the fuck would I want to go to heaven and be stuck with them for eternity?

  • Zozano@aussie.zone
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    2 hours ago

    If you’re convinced out of your faith, it means you never had a good reason to believe in the first place.

  • SnausagesinaBlanket@lemmy.world
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    3 hours ago

    Imagine a club where you can rape and pillage your entire life, ask for forgiveness on your dying breath and you’re in.

      • SnausagesinaBlanket@lemmy.world
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        3 hours ago

        |You can also ask how to spell you’re

        Dear Grammar NAZI. I am disabled and use voice to text. If I pause while talking which I often do, it spells incorrectly about 1 time out of 100. It is not perfect and neither am I. I appreciate you for pointing out my shortcoming that has effected your life to the point that you had to reply on a forum to correct me. Send all your future complaints to Dragon Naturally Speaking. TY

        • Grail@multiverse.soulism.net
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          7 hours ago

          I dunno, I guess I think punitive justice is an inherently fucked up concept. When I was a kid, adults used to say two wrongs don’t make a right. At first I thought they were full of shit, but as I grew older, I learned how horrible prisons are and how they don’t make people better.

          In Christianity, you have to mean it. People can’t turn their beliefs on a dime like that, meaning it takes work. You have to have done the work. Anyone who’s successfully sacrificing Jesus would basically be capable of giving a meaningful apology to the victims and rehabilitating themself.

          Still, heaven isn’t for Me. It’s just not My aesthetic. When I die, I’m going to Ninuan.

          • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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            2 hours ago

            Sure, they can be forgiven, by God, after they suffered a horrible death themselves.

            We don’t even have to execute them, just denny them any services or any companionship from society. Anything not a basic need, and they will wish they died.

            • Grail@multiverse.soulism.net
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              2 hours ago

              After all the Deans being posted on Lemmy, I think I want to talk about Community.

              After Chang kidnapped the Dean and took over the school and was defeated by the study group, he showed up claiming to have Changnesia. Changnesia is a ridiculous lie and nobody believes it at first, but they decide to give him a chance, because we’ve all done bad things.

              Over time we get confirmation that Chang faked his Changnesia, and the characters end up pretty sure of it too. But still, they don’t expose him as a fraud and they don’t send him to prison, where legally, he belongs. Because prison doesn’t solve problems.

              Nobody ever trusts Chang again. Everyone knows he can’t be trusted. He can’t be given power. He’s evil. But he also has feelings, and he deserves happiness, as long as his happiness doesn’t involve hurting anyone.

              May we all have our own redemption, even if it must come from something as absurd as Changnesia.

  • Frettchen@lemmy.world
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    12 hours ago

    When your friend convinced you to go to church and get molested and there is no God

    Pikachu

    • diaphragmwp@discuss.tchncs.de
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      12 hours ago

      Can’t do that face if you don’t have a face

      Unrelated but please never imply “all {ethnic group} is {conventionally bad thing}”, that’s the weapon of the enemy and we don’t use it.

        • Sibshops@feddit.cl
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          11 hours ago

          The worst was when he said, “All Hispanics are 7:00 AM college courses.” (I actually have no idea)

          • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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            5 hours ago

            The monsters i can never stay awake during them. this explains my extended family’s longstanding ethincally and racially based hatred, for which i must give no further explanation

      • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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        11 hours ago

        Love how this is getting downvoted. Like there isn’t a rich and storied history of Satanic Panic in the West. Or an active community of Epstein-brained conservatives who are doing blood libel on anyone who fails the Paper Bag Test.

        • Armok_the_bunny@lemmy.world
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          7 hours ago

          It’s a non sequitur is the problem, and seems to buy into the whole christian prosecution complex that’s a huge problem in the US.

  • rustyfish@piefed.world
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    17 hours ago

    You should see it this way: Look at our world. Look at the bad things. Look at the horrific things. God lets all those things happen AND he wants his dick sucked as if he doing jack shit is a good thing.

    Go to hell. Be a rebel. Be proud of it.

    • Warl0k3@lemmy.world
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      17 hours ago

      You don’t understand, all that suffering and all those dead babies are part of His plaaaaaaan. How can you even have morals without believing in god, please excuse the piles of dead babies.

      • frog@feddit.uk
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        16 hours ago

        Dead babies?

        “God works in mysterious ways.”

        “Trust God’s plan.”

        “Everything happens for a reason.”

        “You have to have faith.”

        “We should pray.”

        “He is testing our faith, like the book of Job.”

        These are the bullshit answers they give us because they don’t really have an answer.

        And when something good happens what do they say?

        “God is good!”

        “Praise the Lord!”

        Look, believe in God all you want but when someone pisses on you, don’t call it rain.

        Have a meaningful conversation of how an all powerful, good God can allow so much suffering. Either he isn’t good or he isn’t powerful.

        • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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          11 hours ago

          Have a meaningful conversation of how an all-powerful, good God can allow so much suffering.

          Evolution is driven by adversity. Organisms experience stress, seek to relieve themselves of that stress, and improve upon their function iteratively over billions of years.

          Pain is a form of information which gives an organism an imperative to change. And with a great number of organisms, you will necessarily have a great deal of suffering. But without that pain, you lose the incentive to change. The end result is stagnation and decay. A lack of pain isn’t joy, it’s numbness. A lack of adversity does not imply triumph but inertia. What you’re asking for isn’t a Utopia, it’s the heat death of the universe.

          • tinyvoltron@discuss.online
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            6 hours ago

            I get it. Rape, murder, war, horrific disease, and all the other “adversity” the all-knowing cock known as God allows is for our own good. It’s like a man beating his wife so she’ll know better next time. She’ll evolve due to the information provided by his fist.

            “What you’re asking for isn’t a Utopia, it’s the heat death of the universe.” I dunno about you but all I’m looking for is a little less genocide, maybe a bit fewer hungry children, maybe some consequences for well-known pedophiles.

            I guess if there is no horrific suffering in the world we won’t evolve. I volunteer you for the next horror, you piece of shit.

    • Drewmeister@lemmy.world
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      17 hours ago

      God has some of the worst fucking representatives. I don’t want to be in a heaven with those assholes

    • gibmiser@lemmy.world
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      17 hours ago

      Yeah, God is kinda an asshole, and if hes not, and hes worried about our opinions of him he really needs to work on his messaging and explaining why stuff has to be so shitty. Being God and all I imagine that isn’t beyond his abilities…

      You know, assuming he existed…

    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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      11 hours ago

      Look at our world. Look at the bad things. Look at the horrific things. God lets all those things happen

      Literally the Al Pacino line while he’s trying to convince his son to fuck his sister.

      Go to hell. Be a rebel. Be proud of it.

      I would simply break the Cycle of Samsara and rejoin the Cosmic Singularity by freeing myself from materialistic desire.

  • red_tomato@lemmy.world
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    16 hours ago

    When the Christian friend convinces you into religion, but it turns out God hates belief in false gods more than non-belief (you picked the wrong religion).

    • Nalivai@lemmy.world
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      12 hours ago

      There is only one guy who guessed correct religion after particularly vivid mushroom trip, but he’s still in hell because he started doing correct things for the wrong motivation.

    • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
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      14 hours ago

      you picked the wrong religion

      There is no way that most people didn’t pick the correct religion. Even if all Christians were “correct” enough to get to heaven regardless of denomination, that still leaves 71%+ of the world who aren’t Christians. And that is best case scenario as Christians are the largest religious group by population in the world currently. And even within the Christian community, there are plenty of in-groups and out-groups that consider one another to be cultish and blasphemy. No matter what you are betting, your chances aren’t great and the majority of the world is still “wrong” and will face whatever consequences come with that fact.

      Personally, I’m happy to just not believe rather than to force myself to conform to some oppressive dogma, dump my time and money into a church, and live with shame just to hedge my bets for what would still be bad odds anyway.

      • HostilePasta@lemmy.ml
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        5 hours ago

        I’m not sure I’ll ever get over how arrogant and simple-minded Pascal’s Wager is. The whole premise is either Christianity or nothing; it doesn’t account for any other religion. I just find it hilarious.

      • Grail@multiverse.soulism.net
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        7 hours ago

        I prefer the simple answer proposed by the Death of the Discworld: everyone is getting exactly what they think is coming to them. The final justice is that of your own conscience.

        So pick a religion that aligns with your personal values and you’ll be alright.

      • zloubida@sh.itjust.works
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        3 hours ago

        It always impresses me how Christianity = evangelicalism in the mind of most Lemmynauts. Outside evangelicalism (and even partly within evangelicalism), going to hell or heaven has nothing to do with being theologically correct or not. I mean, even the Catholic church, which is both by far the biggest one and absolutely not one of the most open ones states with an absolute clarity that non-Christians can go to heaven too.

        • Duamerthrax@lemmy.world
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          11 hours ago

          I’m old enough to remember when kids started taking their new filp phone to public school and secretly recording their teachers berating their muslim or atheist students. The recordings stopped when teachers realized any student could be recording any conversation.

          I’m also coded enough that bigots test the waters with me to see what I’ll agree with. I don’t exactly trust quiet christians. They’re very polite when they assume you’re also religious and things can go quickly downhill if they find out you’re not.

        • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
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          13 hours ago

          Catholics do not believe that non-Christians go to heaven. Best case scenario, righteous unbelievers go to purgatory. Same with unbaptised babies.

          Also, I grew up going to baptist and pentecostal churches. They 1000% do not think my atheist ass is getting into heaven no matter how righteous I am, even though I got baptized for that matter. Unless I repent at the 11th hour and “accept Jesus into my heart as my savior,” anyway. There are certainly plenty denominations that are not all about preaching “hellfire for the unbeliever”, but even plenty of those still believe that is true even if they’re not boasting about it. There are some that allow for people to be saved through ignorance of Jesus (which makes missionary work kind of fucked up when you think about it that way). But even that is not the norm.

          Jesus’ sacrifice saving humanity from eternal damnation is a key tenet of nearly all denominations. And most of them also say that you need to actually accept it and turn your life over to him to qualify for the get out of Hell free card.

          Source: 37 years of life in the Bible belt as both an active churchgoer and apostate.

          • zloubida@sh.itjust.works
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            12 hours ago

            Purgatory is a step that leads to heaven, not a final destination. It’s a step that a lot of Catholics will have to take too, according to the catholic church so it’s not something that separates believers and non-believers.

            Baptism and Pentecostalism are categories of evangelicalism. So yeah, they believe that. But they’re a minority within Christianity.

            Jesus’ sacrifice saving humanity from eternal damnation is a key tenet of nearly all denominations.

            Yes.

            And most of them also say that you need to actually accept it and turn your life over to him to qualify for the get out of Hell free card.

            No. Only in evangelicalism.

            • Rothe@piefed.social
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              27 minutes ago

              No. Only in evangelicalism.

              That is not true. Lots of Christian denominations believe that as well. Most of them in fact. You are just Americentric in your belief that Evangelicalism is automatically meant, when that is not really a large denomination outside of the US.

              • zloubida@sh.itjust.works
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                4 hours ago

                Yeah, that’s what cults do. I’m very sorry, and happy for you you found a way out. It’s better to be an atheist than jailed in a cult, and I know God will understand.

            • Mulligrubs@lemmy.world
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              11 hours ago

              No. Only in evangelicalism.

              False, not only in evangelicalism. The words of Jesus Christ disagree with you. Do you need me to quote the “Narrow Gate” to you? You should be very familiar with it if you’ve read the Bible.

        • Mulligrubs@lemmy.world
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          11 hours ago

          Sure they do! That’s because they’ve become more moderate over the centuries in their long decline since The Great Mortality. This allows them to continue their parasitic ways in a secular society.

          However, they spent many more centuries claiming the exact opposite, because the Bible says that most will burn in Hell. Repeatedly. Throughout.

          The “absolute clarity” is in direct opposition to what they falsely claim is The Word of God. It’s absolutely clear that they are a cancer on the Earth.

          • zloubida@sh.itjust.works
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            3 hours ago

            Wrong. But I had this discussion with evangelicals 1000 hundred times it’s not interesting anymore. I’ll begin by citing theologians like Aquinas (13th century), you’ll answer saying “meh don’t care it’s not in the Bible” or, if you studied theology (but you probably didn’t), citing the one big exception, Augustine (which still wrote that God’s mysterious grace could be greater than what he himself thought). But with that I will have proved that no, it’s not a recent evolution of Christian theology, but something the churches hold still the beginning, with exceptions.

            Then I’ll cite Romans 2:12-16, Luke 12:47-48, Matthew 25:31-46 or Acts 10:34-35, and you’ll do mental gymnastics that will grant you a place in the coming Olympics to reconcile this with the idea that only Christians are saved, using texts like John 3:18. And I’ll say, yes, the Bible contradicts itself on this subject like on most others, but my position is better established and coherent with the global message of the Bible, the church history, and the reason, while yours is not. And you’ll be shocked : “what? You don’t believe in biblical inerrancy? You’re not a Christian!” and I’ll answer “okay, bro”, like I do with disrespectful people on the net.

            And we will both have lost a lot of time, and you will have push more people to hate Christ while you will feel oh so righteous.

          • Grail@multiverse.soulism.net
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            7 hours ago

            Jesus actually uses two different words which get translated as hell: Sheol, and Hades. This makes sense, because most of the people around where he lived were Jews or Hellenists. Sinful Jews go to Sheol, where their souls are cleansed by a purifying fire and they cease to exist. Sinful Hellenists go to the bottom level of Hades, Tartarus, where they’re punished forever.

            Neither of those is what Dante described in his fanfic.

  • OBJECTION!@lemmy.ml
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    12 hours ago

    Jokes on you, my plan all along was to tempt you away from God to secure a better position in Hell, as is the secret motivation of all atheists. Muahahaha!

    • daannii@lemmy.world
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      11 hours ago

      It’s like a reward program/pyramid scheme. The more people you recruit , the more they recruit and you end up at the top of your own pyramid of damnation.

      • OBJECTION!@lemmy.ml
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        11 hours ago

        Look, is it a pyramid scheme? Sure, maybe. But trying to pick the right religion to get into heaven, and even then there’s no guarantee, that’s like playing the lottery. You’re better off signing up now and getting a better spot in the pyramid.

  • Sibshops@feddit.cl
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    16 hours ago

    The old Pascal’s Wager. That’s why I believe in every religion and none at the same time. I have to cover my bases.

  • ceenote@lemmy.world
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    17 hours ago

    Just pull the ole’, “Look! A distraction!” and disappear into the billions-strong crowd stuck in the same boat.